When people talk about the things they love, they do it with sincere passion. You can tell just by looking at the person’s eyes and the way they describe their favorite movie, hobby, and the like. For Italians, food is something they take very seriously. So, when they spot something wrong with some “culinary recreations,” they aren’t hesitant to point it out.
You’ll come across plenty of botched Italian dishes across the internet that look like a total disaster. From the classic pineapple pizza to cheddar cheese on risotto, these crimes against cuisine will make the average Italian throw their pasta across the table.
With that said, let’s look at some of the funniest culinary fiascos that earned a roasting from Italians online.
Cheesy American
For some reason, Americans love adding cheese to just about anything. While this does create some novel delicacies, sometimes it just doesn’t work out. One example is this burger-infused pizza with American cheese on top.
The chef thought it would be a great idea to slap on burgers instead of pepperoni, but an Italian would say otherwise. The patties bring a unique twist, but the melted cheese on top hardly makes it look appetizing. Unless you want excess calories on your pizza, please don’t replicate this.
Of course, you can’t
Canned foods are convenient, but that doesn’t mean anyone should use them as a preferred topping. The debate about pineapple on pizza has been going on forever, and using canned pineapples certainly won’t end the discussion.
What’s surprising is that there’s even a can of pineapple for pizzas. No, the syrup doesn’t make it any better, and it still doesn’t belong on pizza (just ask the Italians). It’s an interesting spin, but only for certain taste buds.
Topping it off
When it comes to toppings, some people take far too many culinary liberties. This person, for example, added a raw egg to their pasta dish. Even the yolk is seasoned as part of the overall garnish.
The garnish doesn’t look half bad, but the presentation of the food is only half the story. Execution is also crucial, and this person forgot that salmonella exists. While some Italians were quick to take a jab at this abomination, others found it hard to digest!
More water, please?
Any good cook can prepare Italian dishes with ease. As long as you stick to the fundamentals, you’re bound to cook tasty meals. Lasagna is a fairly simple dish, but some people just can’t do it right.
This home cook used the right ingredients like fresh tomatoes, ground beef, and ricotta cheese. The only problem is that there’s too much water on the bottom of the pan. With that much water, one could, as Daniele pointed out, wash a car.
Spaghetti donut, anyone?
We love satisfying our sugar cravings with a good old-fashioned donut. However, we can’t imagine the horror of taking a bite and discovering that it’s spaghetti in disguise. This haunting image is enough to lead society into anarchy and throw cultural beliefs out the window!
Pietro knows that this type of food should never see the light of day again. Just think of how long that thing’s been sitting in the freezer. It does kind of look like PacMan, but still, that spaghetti donut looks downright unappetizing.
Mix them all up
There are times where combining certain foods can result in an amazing dish. Think peanut butter and jelly or bacon and eggs. However, this cook took it to a whole new level by making lasagna soup and garnishing it with a loaded ice cream scoop of mixed cheese. Avert your eyes – the following image might make you throw up.
There’s more to cooking food than just mashing things together and expecting a good outcome. Judging by how this looks, it’s hard to call it a dish. Gianni makes some excellent points!
New sauce
Some recipes allow you to swap one ingredient, and the dish will still taste great. For example, you can use tomato jam instead of tomato sauce for your burgers. One thing you cannot do is make spaghetti carbonara using salad cream as the sauce.
The home cook thought they could get away with it, but Giuseppe quickly called out the blasphemy. The dish was so bad, he couldn’t even process his emotions. Now that’s one way to make an Italian mad!
Spread it out
Peanut butter on toast? Absolutely. How about mixed into oatmeal? Sure. But a scoop of peanut butter on pizza? It’s an absolute travesty! While some people may debate about this, there is no conversation for the Italians. Especially if you do it on leftover pizza when the dough is chewy!
Slathering a nutty spread across a pizza slice is like putting ketchup on a ribeye steak. Don’t let your Italian friend catch you or he’ll condemn you on the spot!
Sausages galore
This is another peanut butter fanatic who thinks the nutty spread goes well with virtually anything. The fusion of peanuts and sausage wound up looking like kitty litter, and Alessandro didn’t hesitate in pointing this out.
Are those chocolate bullets? Whatever this person thought of before making this dish, it’s clear that the final product isn’t exactly what they were expecting. For some reason, though, they were happy enough to post it on social media.
Garnish obsession
Plenty of cooking shows have aired in recent years where people learn about the importance of food presentation. Not only should the dishes be tasty, but they should be visually appealing as well. It’s easy to overdo it with the garnishes. Indeed, this photo proves that attention to detail isn’t everything.
It appears the chef focused more on food aesthetics and less on actually cooking the food. Decorating the ingredients of carbonara doesn’t make it a whole dish, and Sonia made sure to let the cook know what she thought.
Slow and steady
You can prepare dishes using a variety of cooking methods. Different people cook food in different ways, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Sometimes, however, there are more efficient ways to prepare a meal, and slow-cooking pasta isn’t one of them.
This home cook thought it was a great idea to use the slow cooker to prepare lasagne. Talk about patience! The most baffling thing about the photo is that the pasta is wrapped inside a plastic bag. Not exactly the best way to cook pasta, that’s for sure.
Stretchy pizza
We all love how mozzarella cheese stretches when we bite into a good slice of pizza. The oozing of cheese is part of the experience, and it makes the pizza more appetizing. However, this image shows a stretchy pizza that may leave you in total disgust.
It’s kind of difficult to tell whether the person is stretching cheese or a sheet of melted plastic. If someone offers you this pizza, run away immediately as the ingredients look more sketchy than stretchy.
Pasta beans
There are occasions where we want a quick fix to curb our appetite. After all, not everyone has the time to prepare a fancy meal. Of course, that’s not to say that you should settle for a bland dish that’s muted in flavor.
This boyfriend thought of making dinner for his significant other by using pasta and canned beans. The caption says ketchup was added later, but we doubt it would make the dish taste any better.
Coral reef pizza
No other Italian food gets botched more than pizza. People love to experiment with pizza and add all sorts of nonsense ingredients to it. This photo is a prime example. The cook dropped an egg in the middle of the pizza for unknown reasons.
The cheese looks unpalatable, the meat is barely cooked, and the dough is inconsistent. Marco shared his sentiments and said that the pizza looks like a “rotten coral reef.” We agree with you Marco, we surely do.
End of conversation
Picture this: you’re an Italian on Tinder, and you’re chatting with this girl. Things are going great until you see a picture of what she thinks passes for carbonara. How would you react? Well, this man stuck to his roots and ended the conversation without hesitation!
Things could have been rosy, but this hideous image of her homemade carbonara ruined the moment for this man. The Italian in him couldn’t handle the thought of dating someone who makes terrible pasta, and we understand.
Italian food appreciation
Italian food isn’t as complex as French cuisine, but it appears that some people lack appreciation (or taste buds) for it. This man went as far as saying that Italian food is overrated. It appears that he can’t distinguish the different flavors of Italian dishes, but thankfully, this Italian quickly put him on blast.
If you don’t know the difference between a risotto and a pizza, how can you say that Italian food is all the same? This man doesn’t seem to know any better.
A three-course meal in one?
For those who love eating three-course meals, you’ll find the next image to be quite appalling. This restaurant guest combined their pasta and salad onto one plate, suggesting they must be super hungry or in a rush to finish their food.
Either way, the food presentation made it much less appetizing, and the lack of dessert was disappointing. Maybe if the guest had a larger plate, they would have dropped the dessert in the middle. Why not?
American vs. Italian pizza
The whole world knows that pizza originated in Italy. Of course, it’s possible that an American chef might be able to produce an incredible pizza, but the comparison made in the image below is all kinds of wrong.
Authentic Italian pizza is packed full of flavor, and the presentation is more appetizing than most American pizzas. Barbara sent a strong message by saying that a “round disk of chalk” is not the pinnacle of the pizza world. We heartily agree!
Cheez whiz, anyone?
Just when you thought the pizza fiasco was over, another variation is making waves on the internet. A restaurant chain decided that adding cheez whiz would make pizza more delicious, but the Italians begged to differ. Take a look at this monstrosity.
There’s a trend in America that involves putting extra cheese on pretty much anything, and we’re not exactly sure why. You can argue with using other types of cheese, but cheez whiz isn’t cheese, and it doesn’t belong anywhere near a pizza.
No turning back
All of us have the power to whip up something incredibly delicious using the contents of our pantry. From simple finger foods to complex pasta dishes, your creativity is the only limit. However, some people take things way too far with the ingredients in their hands.
Imagine eating canned sausages surrounded by macaroni encased in gelatin. The thought of eating something like that is enough to shake you to your very core. Some Italians shared their sentiments and called the dish an abomination. No arguments here!
Taking it a step too far
This food might not look too offensive at first glance, but when you take a closer look, you may just change your mind. The person created this atrocious dish using ingredients like tacos, pepperoni, ramen noodles, and pizza sauce.
Even the most broke Italian student would never dream of making a sinister dish like this.
To be fair, the food does look alright. However, the taste is likely to be the polar opposite. Would you dare to take a bite?
Breaking spaghetti
To most Italians, breaking spaghetti before cooking is a mortal sin. In fact, no chef snaps their pasta in half just because it doesn’t fit inside the pot. Lots of people have strong opinions about this, and it’s a matter of whether you care about cooking pasta the right way or not.
This Italian compared breaking spaghetti to breaking your children’s bones. Our advice? Just stick the pasta in the pot. The heat will soften it up without you having to break it.
Chef hacks
Great chefs take pride in their cooking skills and are more than happy to share a few tips. Offering beginner advice can help tremendously as people learn about the art of cooking. One chef claims that cutting spaghetti before serving makes it easier for children to eat. If that doesn’t sound like blasphemy, we’re not sure what is.
Such a tip falls under the “unsolicited advice” category. Italians would never cut their pasta, and we see absolutely no reason to do it. Slurping it up is half the fun when you’re a kid.
Is that lasagna?
Lasagna is one of those Italian dishes that are easy to recognize. It’s tough to miss and is a staple in most Italian restaurants. Do it wrong, though, and you’ll be on the receiving end of endless mockery. Take it from this person who shared a picture of their unappetizing meal.
This plate of “food’ looks pasty and unappetizing. Giuseppe and Alessandro nailed it with their comments. No self-respecting lasagna lover would want to touch that mess.
Pizza order
Planning a trip to Italy? Then you’d better make sure you get your toppings right, especially when you order pizza. This man went to Naples, Italy, and wondered how the Italians would react if he got pineapple on his pizza.
Sarah made sure to let him know that ordering pineapple on pizza in Italy is a terrible idea. If you’re in the country, do enjoy authentic Italian pizza. Who knows? The man may have ended up getting deported for committing crimes against good taste.
Fruity delights
Italians may find this hard to believe, but some people love adding fruit to their pizza. Forget the pineapples; they’re all in with the strawberries, kiwis, blueberries, and even grapes! A delectable pizza turned into a fruity monstrosity is the last thing an Italian wants to see.
While pizza does use fruit for its sauce (tomato), that doesn’t give you full permission to throw other fruits into the mix. This would be like mixing tomato into your fruit salad, which is a debacle in its own right.
Worse than pineapple pizza
Yes, we have more incoming pizza blunders for Italians to fume over. If you thought fruity pizzas were a bad idea, wait until you see this next photo. An uncultured man added sushi and sashimi as pizza toppings, turning the pie into a fresh seafood “delight.”
The Italian community sensed a great disturbance and dispatched a messenger to address the haunting image. You can enjoy pizza and sushi separately, but combining them into one dish would make for a not-so-mouthwatering experience.
How about spinach lasagna?
Now this one doesn’t look too bad. In fact, the presentation may convince you that this piece of lasagna is delicious. Spinach lasagna isn’t new, and many people enjoy adding other vegetables to this popular Italian dish.
However, the Italian in Jennifer simply refuses to accept any vegetables in lasagna other than basil or oregano. Sure, adding spinach and celery won’t hurt, but the carrots should definitely be omitted. Still, there’s no denying the fact that the food looks appetizing at first glance.
Cinnamon roll pizza?
Good cooks understand how to incorporate different ingredients and give the dish a burst of flavor. For example, one may add heat into stromboli by using chili for that extra kick. A bad cook randomly mashes together ingredients without much thought.
Such is the case with this pizza that has cream cheese icing on top of a cinnamon roll crust. There’s so much going on with this pizza that all the flavors clash and you don’t know what to expect when you bite into it.
Cheese affair
It’s no secret that Italians love their cheese. You’ll find cheese in many Italian recipes, and that’s because they take pride in their cheesemaking traditions. Each cheese is carefully paired with the other flavors in a dish to create the ideal flavors.
Getting the shape of the cheese wrong is a blatant sign of disrespect to the culture of Italy, and Melissa was very vocal about this. This might seem surprising, but mozzarella cheese in Italy actually comes in spherical shapes and not rectangular blocks (mind blown).
A little room for error
There’s a reason why many people love using a slow cooker, and that’s because you can make quick corrections. Since the cooking process takes time, you can easily rectify your mistakes and save the dish. Sadly, that wasn’t the case for this home cook who dabbled with tortellini in the slow cooker.
Instead of getting al dente pasta, this person wound up with a bland, pale-looking dish. The chunks of cheese aren’t helping either, making the dish look like a complete mess.
Asian fusion
One of the most atrocious incarnations of an Italian dish is pasta rice. This fusion of Asian and Italian cuisine has tantalized the taste buds of many, but certainly not the Italians. In this photo, the cook nonchalantly added rice into their penne pasta without any hesitation.
The person didn’t even attempt to make the dish look appetizing. There’s zero garnish, zero cheese, and zero toppings. Whoever made this monstrosity needs to be exorcised to purge the evil entities that directed his actions.
Survival food
Do you have that one friend who loves to spread ketchup on everything he eats? This person took it to a whole new level by using ketchup as the sauce for their conchiglie. Yes, ketchup actually passes as a pasta sauce for some people.
The raw tomatoes and the vegan sausages cemented this dish as a form of survival food. We get it, some people simply don’t have the time to cook. However, this is totally unacceptable, and the ketchup seals the deal.
Alfredo meat
Steak and pasta are delicious, but what if you were to eat both of those meals on a single plate? Apparently, some people don’t mind, as demonstrated by this bone-chilling image.
How someone can disrespect Alfredo pasta like that is beyond us. Not to mention the fact that the meat looks dry and barely seasoned. The person responsible for this should repent for their sins and never commit this wrongdoing again. The Italians are willing to forgive.
Gnocchi madness
Gnocchi is one of those finger foods that’s hard to mess up. It’s simple to prepare and it only requires a few ingredients. For some reason, this person thought that gnocchi and gravy would be a match made in heaven.
Instead of looking like an appetizer, the gnocchi turned into a nest of larvae. Lidia shares the same sentiment, saying that this gnocchi madness can turn into butterflies someday. Maybe the cook loves Mother Nature and took larvae as inspiration.
Is it carbonara, though?
If you were to present that to a non-Italian and call it carbonara, they probably wouldn’t bat an eyelid. However, the scallops and the lemon zest garnish are tell-tale signs that this dish is one of those pasta variations an Italian would never accept.
Chefs love to put their creativity into the mix, and while the creator’s artistic license is evident in this photo, Italians are giving it a hard pass. Points to the chef for a fancy plating attempt, but they’re not gonna fool Italians with that.
Not feeling it
When it comes to traditional Italian recipes, there’s not much you can do to improve on perfection. One thing you want to avoid is combining two recipes like ravioli and lasagna. If you think that’s going to make the new dish taste great, you’re in for an unpleasant surprise.
One glance at this ravioli-lasagna fiasco is enough for an Italian to call a crisis hotline. Petro should have dialed the cook’s phone number and put him on blast for this utter disaster.
That’s not lasagna
They say homemade food tastes better because it’s cooked from the heart. However, it appears this homemade lasagna isn’t meant for human consumption. Two words immediately come to mind when looking at this picture: dog food.
It’s not like the person even tried to make lasagna because the food looks like someone just puked onto the plate. The disgust meter on this dish is off the charts, and no one is gonna mistake that for lasagna, ever.
Meat substitutes
Italian recipes are open to various adaptations. As long as the dish keeps its essence, you’re free to substitute an ingredient or two. However, the Italians want to clarify one thing: bacon is not the same as pancetta.
Carbonara is plagued by people using bacon as a substitute. While you can get away with bacon on carbonara, don’t let your Italian friends see you eating it. Their grandma might just get a heart attack, and you don’t want that on your conscience.
Scrambled pasta
By now, you may have gathered that ketchup on pasta is a crime, and the Italians are having none of it. What’s even more revolting than ketchup-seasoned spaghetti, you ask? Putting scrambled eggs on top, that’s what.
It’s hard to digest the thought process that went into this dish. Seriously, who thinks that ketchup pasta and scrambled eggs are delicious? Marco was a bit harsh, but we can’t blame him for wanting to roast this person for their crimes against Italian cuisine.